Does this necklace make my boobs look big?

When I was a kid, I loved being able to paw through my mom's jewelry box.  Certain items still stand out:  The dangly earrings with the orange sequin dangle balls, a pair of clip on gold and rhinestone clip earrings that were shaped like a cross between a sunburst and a starfish.  A gold circle pin that was a staple of every jewelry collection in the 50's and 60's.  Various brooches.  Her turquoise jewelry when turquoise became The Thing to wear in the 70's although no Squash Blossom necklaces because those were way too expensive.   Beaded and "goldtone" necklaces.  Her diamond engagement ring which she never wore.  Going through my mommy's jewelry box was always so Glamorous.

There were two drugstores near my childhood home, Danber Drugs and Hill Drugs.  Both of these drugstores were more like general stores and sold just about everything from clothing and cosmetics to housewares to hardware to automotive stuff as well as large "gift" departments filled with kitschy tchotchkes.  Which is where my sisters and I bought the majority of our parents Christmas presents when we were kids.  You could get a round plush purple smiley face pillow for $2.00!  Or a resin statue of a funny looking little guy holding his arms wide with the caption, "I love you THIS much!" for practically pennies!  

But what I loved most about these drugs stores was the jewelry counters.  I always thought the rhinestone necklaces, bracelets, earrings and brooches were sooooooo elegant and beautiful.  And that they were real diamonds, of course.  When you're 6 or 7 and sparkly jewelry has a $17.95 price tag on it, why WOULDN'T you think they were real diamonds?

This is other vintage necklace I bought at the Antique Swap Meet in my quest to try to add some stylish flair to my dull and mundane sense of style.  And yes, that is a Target t-shirt, the stapled backbone of my wardrobe.  And that simple $5 necklace was enough to cause every member of my family along with Thing 1's cronies to ask why I was "all dressed up."  Who knew that putting on a necklace of plastic beads was the equivalent of "all dressed up." Okay, I guess they aren't used to seeing me Accessorized and it's completely throwing them out of whack.

As is my wont when I become interested in something, I become obsessed very focused and spend hours on my new interest, allowing other things to fall by the wayside.  Which is why for the last few days I've been giving myself a headache by staring at the Vintage costume jewelry section of eBay for hours on end. And why I've been slacking in the housework department more than usual.  And why I'll probably mosey on up to Retro Row this weekend. After going and test-driving a 2011 Kia Optima because I'll get a $25 Visa Gift Card if I do, which can then be used to purchase even MORE Accessories which will cause my family's heads to practically EXPLODE.

The Power of the Accessory.  Making heads explode since the dawn of time.  Or, 2011.