Goin' to the Chapel

21 years ago today I was sitting in a small room here:

It was hot and stuffy and I was impatiently waiting for my cue to go and appear at the door of the chapel on the arm of my dad who would lead me up the aisle to my density destiny to become Mrs. TheManTheMyth.  But the clock was ticking and I sat there waiting, waiting, waiting.  Which is pretty unusual when you think about it.  Aren't brides always supposed to be late?  Not me.  I had done my own hair and makeup at home and all I had to do when I got to the chapel was change into my dress and put on my veil and await my cue.


But no wedding can come off without a hitch (get it?) and mine was no exception.  I'm sitting in that hot and stuffy room on that beautiful April day, waiting, waiting, waiting.  And wondering what the heck was taking so long.  Finally, the minister comes in and says, "We have a bit of a problem."  Problem?  We have a problem?  What kind of problem do we have, I ask, wondering if TheManTheMyth had bailed on me (he didn't...but probably has wished more than once that he did).

Turns out our best man was in a bit of a fender bender in the parking lot and  an ambulance had been called (not for him) and he had to give a police report so it would be about a half hour before he would be done and would I like some water or something while I waited?

No, what I wanted was to walk down the aisle and get married!  What I did not want was to sit in that hot and stuffy room any longer.  So, in an unusual twist, TheManTheMyth was brought in from mingling with the guests outside the chapel and he was kept hidden from me and I went to say howdy to all my guests who were hanging outside the chapel until it was time to go in and get the show on the road.

After about 45 minutes, our Best Man finally appeared and it was Show Time!  My Daddy proudly walked me down the aisle to hand me off to TheManTheMyth.

I defied ANYONE to stand up and claim I had no business wearing a veil over my face.  Don't you judge me.


So the minister pronounced us Husband and Wife and off we headed to our reception where we entered to great fanfare as Mr. and Mrs. TheManTheMyth:

It was time to Par-Tay!

My Gramma, in the purple dress was a dancing fool!  We couldn't get her off the dance floor.


During the "pay to dance with the happy couple" portion, I was dancing with this guy and as he was unfamiliar to me, I asked him his name, which was Chuck, and asked if he was a friend of TheManTheMyth's.  He wasn't.  I asked if he was a friend of either family.  He wasn't.  I asked him if he was the date of any of our friends.  He wasn't.  Ok, I give up.  He was a Wedding Crasher!  He happened to stop by the house of one of our groomsmen the morning of the wedding and decided he had nothing better to do that day so he rounded up a group of friends and they all came and crashed our wedding.  I found out later that Chuck bummed a couple of bucks from my sister so he could dance with me.  We still see Chuck every so often and we always laugh about how we met when he crashed our wedding.


TheManTheMyth and I didn't get a honeymoon because I had just started a new job and was lucky to get the Friday and Monday of that weekend off.  But we spent a very memorable wedding night.  Memorable for the wrong reasons.


After the reception, TheManTheMyth's Uncle Bob invited everyone over to his house to wind down and relax, which we did for a couple of hours.  TheManTheMyth changed out of his wedding attire and put on a pair of shorts and a Hawaiian shirt and some flip-flops.  Then my new husband and I headed off to our hotel where we had dinner reservations at the fancy French restaurant at the hotel which was good because I was STARVING.  We get to the hotel, check in at the desk and then can't find the building where our room is located.  We drove around and around and I was getting pretty irritable as I hadn't really eaten all day and when my blood sugar drops, I get, well, bitchy.  


So we finally find our room (no, I wasn't carried over the threshold) and start to get ready for dinner.  TheManTheMyth opens his suitcase and I hear him say, "uh oh."  He was looking into an empty suitcase.  This was not good.  There was no way we could go down to the fancy French restaurant with him in shorts and flip flops.  We got into our first fight over what happened to his clothes that *I* had packed myself to make sure he didn't forget them.  What the hell happened to his clothes?  What were we supposed to do for dinner?  I called room service and was told it would be well over an hour before they could deliver anything.  I was so hungry and angry and hungry that I just wanted to cry.  But instead, I picked up the phonebook, picked up the phone and called Dominos because they deliver.  And they did, in less than 30 minutes.  I pretty much blocked everything out around me and inhaled that pizza.  And when I was done, I turned to look at TheManTheMyth with a smile on my face that faded when I saw that he was passed out sound asleep.  Goody.


We found out the next day that while we were at Uncle Bob's after the wedding, my BIL needed a change of clothing for some reason and asked TheManTheMyth if he had any spare clothes in the car.  TheManTheMyth told him there should be something in the car not realizing that his brother helped himself to the clothes in the suitcase.  I think alcohol was a factor in this decision as it never occurred to BIL that there was a reason there were clothes in a suitcase in our car on our wedding day.



So that was what was happening in my life 21 years ago.  And every day I tell TheManTheMyth how much he loves me and he just nods his head and says, "yes dear."


Ahhh, wedded bliss!