Thursday, July 1, 2010

I'm not stoned, I'm stupid!

I'll admit, sometimes I'm as dense as pudding.  As dense as drywall compound.  As dense as concrete.  Let's face it, I can't see the forest for the trees.

Case in point:  I was working as a receptionist for a direct mail company.  Lots of phone calls in those days before automated voice systems and the switchboard was very tricky but I was damn good at it, always have been a fantastic receptionist if I do say so myself and well lookey there, I did say so myself.  

Ahem.  Anyway, I had been working as a receptionist for this company for a few months when the head of another department stopped at the front desk to ask how I was doing, how did I like working for the company and did I know there was an opening in her department?  I did know because I had to sort through the applications, administer tests to the applicants who came in for interviews (most of them them failed the tests all applicants were given.  Sad) and report back to Human Resources with my impressions of the applicants.  Obviously, they thought I had a brain and valued my opinion.  Department Head asked if I had given any thought to this position my ownself because she thought I was perfect for the job.

And dumb, box o' rocks me said no, I was fine and happy where I was, answering phones, opening mail, greeting visitors.  Yeah, Executive Washroom, here I come!

HELLO???  She was offering me a promotion with a higher salary and I declined.  Because I'm stupid.  The other people from that department took me to lunch about a week later and smacked me with a clue by four and I reconsidered and accepted the position that was being handed to me on a platter.

So yes, I'm clueless.

Back at Christmastime, TheManTheMyth and I were watching TV and the commercial for the Kindle came on and he asked me to explain what the Kindle was/is and I did and he asked me if that was something I'd be interested in for Christmas?

And I, the ardent bibliophile, the person who has books littering and cluttering up the house, the person who is usually reading 3 or 4 books at one time (one for reading in bed, one for reading in my car when waiting to pick up Thing 2 from school, one in the living room, one in the bathroom) said, "Nah, I don't think it's something I really need."

Cheezus Christ on a Cracker, how dumb could I be?  TheManTheMyth even looked at me like, "Are you stoned or just stupid?"

Obviously, since I haven't done drugs in a decade or two, I was stupid.  And now, now that I realize why yes, I do indeed want a Kindle, a Kindle would be FABULOUS, a Kindle would make my reading so much more convenient and bring Joy to my life, funds are pretty tight on account of work being very slow, again, and every spare cent is needed for things like food, mortgages and health insurance.  Even a used Kindle is not feasible at this time, unless I sell some plasma or my dried up 47 year old eggs or something.

Maybe THIS Chrismas, when TheManTheMyth asks if I want a Kindle, I won't be so stupid as to refuse.

But don't count on it.


  1. Not to rub salt in the wound or anything, but I do love my Ipad just for that reason.

    I'm kind of the same way, slow to the take, but at least for the big job, you got to reconsider and take the offer.

    I'm on vacation this week, running around Chicago with my energized bunny family, but I'll be back to blogworld next week in full force.

  2. Technology changes so fast these days. You just figure out how to work one thing with all its bells and whistles and something new comes along. Do a little research on what's out there so when MythMan asks you if you want a Kindle, you'll have your answer ready that you want the most expensive, up to date device there is.

    Personally, I'm with you. I like to turn the pages. After all, we don't say, "Wow, that book was a real page clicker".